Category Archives: blather

A plethora of posts to write–quick hits–teacher politics, horse politics, and a fun reflection on writing with kids

As usual, life’s gotten busy and I have things to write about which just ain’t happenin’ as individual posts at the moment.

To start with, David Gilmour (NOT the Pink Floyd musician but the writer and lit prof) doesn’t like teaching about women writers. There’s dozens of excellent rants around the web about his sexism, but I’ve got an additional reaction which seriously provokes my ire–the assumption on his part that teaching is all about being able to present material smoothly and effectively (his assertion that “I’m a natural teacher” where he goes on to state that his experience speaking on camera gives him Magic Teacher Juju).

Um. Erm. HULK SMASH NOW?!

There’s significantly more to being a good teacher than whether you can deliver a brilliant presentation. If that’s your only tool, then you’re a good lecturer. That’s different from being a good teacher. A good teacher can develop the sort of connection with his or her students that allows the teacher to quickly ascertain student understanding on the fly, diagnose what is/isn’t working, and modify both presentation and individual/small group instruction (which may or may not include the lecture) IN PROCESS to facilitate learning. You can be a brilliant lecturer but a crappy teacher.

Additionally, that conflating of lecture and the art and science of teaching is symptomatic of the sort of mentality that pervades much of the current educational deformist movements in the US public education system at the moment, usually mouthed by those who haven’t set foot in a classroom since they left it as students. Yes, you have to be able to know your subject and communicate what you know to students. But–you have to be able to diagnose when learning runs off of the rails and figure out how to fix it–fast. That sort of understanding doesn’t come from book larnin’, folks–it comes from practice, observation, and more practice.

My sense from both the linked interview and Gilmour’s own statements, plus additional commentary from students, is that he may be a brilliant lecturer, but at least half of his students aren’t necessarily learning (and can we guess which gender that is?). I don’t care whether he’s at a university or in the k-12 system–that’s not the mark of an effective or natural teacher. ‘Nuff said.

Next item. Mark Arbello, the San Diego horse trainer who killed a horse in training by using a tie-around method of bitting up. From what I’ve read so far, there are so many things wrong with how he executed that particular method that it isn’t even funny. I have seen this tool used effectively with a limited subset of hard-case rehab horses whose next stop was the auction if they didn’t turn around, but Arbello did Every. Damn. Thing. Wrong. Shanked bit, not a snaffle (for the non-horsey, a shanked bit puts leverage pressure on the horse’s head in a very painful way if used for this purpose and can lead to the type of reaction which caused this lovely mare’s death). Cranked tight and hard (nope). Tied the horse up instead of letting the horse move on their own. Unsupervised. Grrr.

For the record, I don’t use this tool. I know how to use it, but I don’t. I prefer a side rein method, loosely adjusted so that the horse practices moving in balance but is figuring it out for themselves–and the horse is supervised so that if it causes anxiety instead of the desired result, the human can quickly intervene to prevent a blowup.

Of course, there are plenty of folks out there condemning both techniques with a broad brush and insisting that the way they use side reins is the Only True Way. Sigh. Horse politics are too damn much like health care politics these days, everyone’s waxing opinionated with closed minds. ‘Nuff said with that grumble.

And last of all, for those who are still reading, I’m having some fun times working on a vocabulary story with my intervention class students. I’m not fond of the drill and kill method of vocabulary development where you make kids look up lots of words in the dictionary and write them down, plus use the word in a sentence. A little bit of this work to teach how to use the dictionary is useful, but that’s what you use it for. For vocabulary development, they’ve got to use the words and understand their meaning. I’ve graded enough half-ass-done dictionary vocabulary exercises with poorly written sentences that I don’t like to do that method.

Instead, I want kids to use the words in a way that helps them understand the meaning of these words–ergo, vocabulary pictionary, vocabulary charades, and what I’m doing now–the vocabulary story.  This is a new thing, but basically, I created three categories–event, personality, scene–and had the kids classify the vocabulary words accordingly. Boy, was that ever a knock-down, drag-out argument in some cases, but the kids came up with good justification for that placement. Then, yesterday, we started creating characters, settings, and the first beginnings of plot.

Wow. Can we say buy-in? And, as we discussed how to incorporate various elements of the words into a story (conundrum, assonance, inference are just some of the vocabulary words), I noticed that the kids started talking authoritatively about the meaning of the words, and when I’d throw out a question about how we could craft a character to reflect those words, they got it.

Cool.

Though I’ve gotta say, the stories may well turn out to be this rather bizarre mishmash of Philip K. Dick, Terry Pratchett, and some very, very odd cartoons. But all in good fun. After all, how often do I get to work with pink unicorn ninjas in a moldy candy cane forest? Nonetheless, the kids are excited and engaged–which is really, really good.

 

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On time travel and oooh them awful girl cooties

So Charlie Stross appears to have committed one of those “oh no headdesk no no” moments when he asserted that there’s a dearth of female time travelers in SF, going on to claim that it’s harder for women to exercise the sort of agency a time traveler could/should enjoy in older, potentially more sexually repressive societies.

Ahem (Marge Piercy, Woman at the Edge of Time for starters, cough-cough).

While there’s been some most excellent counters to his assertions from various excellent women writers, I want to throw my two cents in as well, based on my own knowledge of local and regional history in the Pacific Northwest of the United States.

Right off the bat, I’ll confess to an occasional fascination for the tales of women adventurers in the Old West of North America (okay, maybe I’ll give Stross a pass on these, simply because that’s a regional focus and he may not know of them). Not all of them were cross-dressing as male, though there are some absolutely incredible stories about women who lived their lives out as remote cowboys, only to be outed upon severe injury or death. Some were spouses or female companions to males–Narcissa Whitman and Eliza Spaulding are two who come quickly to mind, along with Sacajawea and Marie Dorion.

But there were plenty-many other women in the Old West who went out along with the boys and held their own. Some, like Elinore Pruitt Stewart, were simply trying to make a living. We know about Elinore because of her entertaining published letters, but she and her sister ranchwomen had no qualms about loading up wagons and horses and going out on their own for camping and fishing expeditions, either with or without the men.

Elinore wasn’t the only one, though. Looking at my shelf of memoirs and diaries of settler women, I find Eileen O’Keeffe McVicker, Phoebe Goodell Judson, Agnes Morley Cleaveland, Harriet Fish Backus, and others. If you add in the Victorian adventure travelers, there’s Isabella Bird as well as a host of others. Dee Brown, Janet Robertson and others.

Granted, these are all frontier colonial women, in a specific setting and we won’t go into the issues which arise therein (except to point out that Native women also had similar bold and adventuring women–we just don’t hear those stories). But if I can think of these histories of real, actual women on just one continent, of women who weren’t necessarily madonnas, teachers or prostitutes, then who’s to say that a time-traveling woman with appropriate research couldn’t have found a way to fit into these societies?

Hmm. Methinks I have a twinkling of a story idea here.

That is, after I write the Big Post-Apocalyptic story with strong female leads who don’t defer to Big Male Macho Boy Sex Fantasies (otherwise known as my oh no John Barnes no moment).

Yeah. Let’s just say I’m a grumpy and disgusted crone at the moment.

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Well, that was a weekend

Those of you who know me personally are aware that I don’t have a lot of tolerance for high temperatures, especially humid high temps. I’ve done a lot of what’s recommended to help, but the bottom line is still this–I’m a lousy candidate for muggy, warm survival situations. Give me snow and ice any day instead, or else dry heat with cool evening temps. Hydration, electrolytes–no matter what, all of that is temporary. At some point, I succumb to the effects of heat exhaustion if I go through too many days of high heat without any cool relief. Come the big global warming, you’ll find me as high up on a mountainside as I can stand to be, probably seeking the last glacier for relief. If climate change turns to global cooling instead, I’ll be a happy girl.

Heat problems happened this past Friday. The temps hit the mid-90s on Wednesday, even on the Mountain, followed by two days where it was almost as hot. And muggy. Even worse in my south-facing classroom, where I couldn’t really open my door because of the noise and distraction from younger kids at recess for most of the afternoon.

Wednesday and Thursday were survivable, though the warnings from the ol’ bod started popping up on Friday morning with roiling gut, achy muscles, and general fatigue. But on Friday afternoon, as the room temps climbed toward 80+ degrees, I was struggling. I opened the door as soon as I could, but even that gave me and the kids little relief. I was simply grateful that my classes weren’t larger.

Still, I felt awful as I left work. I’d planned to go to the barn and ride Mocha, but realized that might not be too good an idea. I went home, self-medicated for the body aches with a couple of drinks after a good dinner…and ended up hurling it all back up. Fairly predictable, and it’s something that has happened in the past, even without the alcohol. It didn’t help that the house was hot because we’d had a contractor in to repair some dry wall, so the house had to be open to air out the smell while the mud dried. Even with ice packs on my neck I felt miserable and sick.

Saturday was pretty much a lost cause. I slept until noon, drank water mixed with sugar and salt to help my gut absorb it, but it wasn’t until 4 pm–about 24 hours after leaving that hot, muggy room–that I started feeling remotely human. Shortly after that I started writing, and got in about 1500 words. By Sunday I was sufficiently recovered, though tired, enough to clean up the room that had gone through dry wall repairs and move everything back, plus do lesson planning and write a little bit.

At least this is probably it for hot weather around here this year. Next spring, even if it is hot, won’t be so bad because of the angle of the sun. It’s only horrible in the fall (thank you so much Nasty Past Administrator who had the trees that blocked that sun cut down).

(And for those of you who’d offer advice, suggest ice pack head coverings, ice pack bandannas and the like–nope. All forbidden by dress codes for students which means I can’t do them either. And fans get subject to other issues of accessibility plus they don’t do that much for air movement. This is just a kvetching post, not a solicitation for advice.)

It wasn’t a completely lost weekend, for which I am grateful. Needless to say, I’m welcoming the coolness and wet today. It’ll still take a few days for the system to completely be happy post-heat, but like my rescue chrysanthemums that kept springing bigger and bigger the more I watered them this weekend, I’m coming back from the heat.

Winter is coming–and I’m one who’s looking forward to it.

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OCF and other stuff

I really have to either block out time for blogging or else spend time writing posts that get published some time after I’ve written them. Sigh.  Just a busy life at the moment.

Anyway. Last weekend we went to Oregon Country Fair and stayed at our favorite campground nearby. Well, okay, about three quarters of a mile or so by foot from our campsite to the front gates. We are part of a larger group that we just sort of fell into our first year camping in the very back end of the site. It’s a congenial place to hang out and our accustomed spot in the campground is pretty private. We usually camp in the trees with our door facing away from the main trail.

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One of the things about Fair is a lot of wry little visual jokes and word puns, as well as lovely decorations. This year, one of the campers decorated the little trail leading from the campground to the road.

 

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Fair is about a lot of things. There’s music, and entertainment, including some really amazing acrobatic work. This year the acrobatic performances were just plain stunning. There’s also food, and crafts, and other fun stuff. I put aside a small budget for shopping at two of my favorite clothing vendors, Organic Attire and Intertwined Designs. I don’t buy a lot, but I buy something every year, especially from Organic Attire because I love their cotton clothing and their designs. I love Intertwined Designs’s capri pants because they’re the first capri that actually looks good on me and they’re quite durable! I now have three pairs….anyway, both vendors feature good quality, durable, organically produced clothing.

But the food…Country Fair is a safe place for me to find food I can eat with my allergies. And, this year, at a neighboring campground, I discovered a food vendor who makes gluten-free crepes! So for two mornings I had a chocolate gluten-free crepe for breakfast. Yum. I have not had crepes for YEARS due to my allergies.

The other thing about camping at Fair is that it is safe, friendly, and pretty doggone relaxing. After setting up camp on Thursday, we just plain hung out, visited with folks, walked around admiring the other camp decorations, and read/wrote (DH read, I wrote). We went into Fair on Friday, saw the performances we wanted to see, ate lots of good food, visited my favorite gluten-free cupcake booth, and I did my clothing shopping. Saturday, we hung out around camp and red/wrote, then went to Fair late to see some performances and eat dinner.

We didn’t go into Fair on Sunday but took our time packing, had more crepes, and said our farewells. That I-5 drive was foremost on our minds so we made sure we got out on the freeway fairly early and avoided traffic until about Aurora, when we bailed off of 5 and onto 99E.

Wow. What a short summary for such a fun time. I did sell some books and did some promos. And I wrote. But, most of all, I relaxed. One nice thing about our campground is the solar showers. Big solar showers. We went to the showers about midday and, in spite of lines to get in, still had lots of comfortably warm water to shower.

The campground had its own entertainment, with bands playing at night, fire spinners, and drum circles. Individual camps had smaller bands, and our camp features a nighttime movie show.

All in all, a good, relaxing time. But now we have to wait another year for it to happen again. Sigh.

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So that was a long weekend

Besides going to the Blues Festival, I managed to write 7200 words on a short piece–one of the Netwalk Foundations segments. It will be going up next week. And now I absolutely have to stop writing long pieces for what’s supposed to be a short snippet worldbuilding promo, not full-on short stories. Period. I’ll do that after the last Daughters piece.

Still, I managed to get some good ideas in place for what the conflict will be in what was Netwalking Mars and will now be Netwalking Space. Because, well, pacing doesn’t work for Mars, but the Moon and space stations and near-earth-orbit asteroids and killer drone satellites from God-Knows-What’s-Out-There do work. Boy howdy, do they ever work. I also figured some things out about Netwalk’s Children, but those pieces still need to come together. These long stories at least are serving a function–they’re helping me work on some of the main story concepts, while writing scenes that probably won’t be in any of the books, but are turning points nonetheless.

Meanwhile, Blues Festival was a lot of pleasant music, and I managed to pull off some exobrain stuff that actually works. I found a bus tracker app for my iPhone which worked right nicely for what we needed it to do. Then I was able to use my iPhone as a personal hotspot, write on my tablet (with detachable keyboard), and upload the day’s work to Dropbox, come home, download it on the main computer, and work some more. Worked smooth as can be. Yeehaw.

Plus I also figured out the Facebook app on my iPhone, and read everything I’ve downloaded in my Kindle. Okay, that took less time than I thought it would. I can see that if I ever get a job again where I can commute by bus, my e-book reading investments will go up. Not that such a thing is ever likely to happen (big sigh). Not unless I can find something that isn’t a teaching job, I think, and right now any job prospect looks pretty damn dim. I still want to get away from the 80+ mile commute, but based on the results of the last teacher hiring season–bleh. So not happening this year. Or next year, really, because I just don’t see the employment and economic situation improving. Bleh, bleh, bleh. Let’s just say that job world is a pit of despair and leave things at that.

At least on the horse front everything is going reasonably well. Miss Mocha has taken to nickering at me when I go out to ride her nearly every day. Her coat shines like it should this year. Now, if I could only fix those damn brittle hooves without resorting to yucky nasty soaks. It’s not that the hoof wall is particularly dry, it’s that the wall is thin, whether she’s barefoot or shod. At least when she’s barefoot she builds up a thicker sole and is less ouchy than she is in shoes (seriously, horse? Ouching across gravel with shoes on? Really?). She gets a biotin supplement (Trifecta) but we still have cracks and chips up the wazoo, mustang roll or no mustang roll, shoes or no shoes.

This year it’s pretty bad, but I keep wondering about the weird coat from last summer/fall and how it may have impacted her hoof growth. Still haven’t figured out why that weird coat growth happened, but nonetheless, despite no changes in husbandry, no changes in health, she had a hair coat that just didn’t grow in right last fall and winter. I keep looking at her hooves and I swear I can see the difference about an inch down with better, firmer hoof wall. I suppose that means we’ll have a few more months or so of dealing with that hoof wall.

Anyway, we’re having good works right now. Back in the curb, my thumb’s healed up so I can manage the neck rein like I should. I’m watching now for the first signs that we’ll need hock injections. So far, just the beginning hint that the time might come in August, but nothing for certain yet.

And that’s it for today.

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Busy, busy days.

Do I have any other sort of days? Sometimes I wonder. In any case, three weeks into summer break and I am busy taking online classes, riding Mocha almost every day, doing projects around the house, and writing. The heat of the past few days has sidelined me but that’s the usual state of affairs, especially when we have this rapid transition from cool to hot. Needless to say, I’m a typical west-side Pacific Northwest girl. I know that when I start struggling, the smartest thing is to go flat and read. So I have been. Problem is also that the heat causes my gut to make sad noises at me and go into random spasm modes. Not fun at all!

Today starts the Waterfront Blues Festival, which is one of DH’s favorite events. He’s already down there waiting to get in early and snag a shady place to sit. Because I struggle so much with the heat, I come down later in the day and join him. This year I’m hoping to be able to coordinate smartphone and tablet so I can do some writing work using Dropbox. We’ll see how that goes. Worst case scenario, I get stuck with writing longhand. Not that big a deal either–after I file down my nails today. I’ve already broken one, damn it.

I’m grappling with some of the issues coming up in Netwalk’s Children. I have several murky things I want to address–the nature of parental influence and control, the effect of prenatal and immediate postnatal virtual exposures (one symptom is a tendency toward extreme sensory overloads which create meltdowns that look a lot like autism), just what the hell Gizmo is and what its goal ultimately will be, matriarchal concerns across generations, matriarchal dynastic behaviors…oh yeah, this book has some interesting potential. Any book at this stage of development is full of potential, but this one in particular has me contemplating some big issues–and how to make it a whopping good story. We will be seeing Bess making a huge mistake which has monstrous consequences that will alienate her from her grandmother Diana (but will have the effect of endearing her to her great-grandmother, the Netwalker Sarah). We’ll see a more human side of Andrew (so far we’ve really only seen him fail). But the biggest piece is that we’re looking at the third/fourth generations to interact with Gizmo and the consequences thereof–not just to the humans but to Gizmo itself.

And space. Bess functions well in space, she adapts well to it and her children will be even more so.

So yeah. Good stuff ahead.

Mocha has also gotten into the regular work mode. I’ve been riding her in the bareback pad with a snaffle during these hot days (well, and also waiting for the farrier to trim her hooves, I don’t like working her in complex fast stuff when her feet get too long. Too easy to torque joints that way). She chuckles at me when I walk in the barn door and is right there ready to go out, even with fresh alfalfa in her manger. There’s been some interesting adventures in bareback pad world, including a moment where the cinch came off and I only discovered that because the pad was sliding back underneath me (a strange feeling when the pad is sliding but you are not). We’ve been working on spins, extension and collection at walk and trot, and I’m slowly working my way up to rollbacks and flying changes. So far Mocha’s let me know SHE doesn’t think I’m ready, mainly by doing simple changes and trotting the first steps of the rollback rather than her usual fast stop, whirl and run. In this case I’m respecting her choice, but we are revisiting it under saddle because I don’t want these behaviors to become habits.

The routines of summer. I still need to work on losing five pounds. I need to get more fit for skiing this winter. I went into skiing with poor fitness and hip problems last year, and it made the season not fun. This will not happen this coming season, not if I can help it!

The fourth of July really is the beginning of summer, at least summer in my world. What are other people doing for summer this year?

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Another day in the land of damp and cool-horse and writing and stuff

Classic Western Oregon June summer day–rain, partially cloudy, and 60s. Sooner or later we’ll get warm here, but this is a pattern I’m well familiar with. Still would like to see it go away before Blues Festival, though.

It was a busy day, but I got stuff done. House doesn’t look like it, but I actually was rather productive. Got a car to the garage, wrote about 1300 words, rode horse, made taco salad, cooked asparagus and prepped strawberries and blueberries. After this post I’ll probably work on mucking out the office and getting ready for my Friday-Saturday class, as well as getting ready to start on my online classes. Busy summer.

Actually, this morning, after dropping the car off to the garage, I hiked through part of the old neighborhood and settled in at the local Starbucks to sip some tea and write. I had to wrestle with my phone, but I now have a lovely transit app which lets me check when buses are due. Go me! It took some fussing because the TriMet page on my phone’s browser kept wanting to do something with Facebook, but I finally beat everything into shape. And now I can haz transit tracker (very useful in the land of PDX and for the rest of the summer!).

After writing for about thirty minutes, I packed up, caught the bus, and headed home. Futzed around doing stuff for a half-hour, then headed to the barn whereupon Miss Mocha felt very put-upon to get ridden TWO DAYS IN A ROW, OH NOES. Then she realized we were doing the bareback pad, which perked her right up. This summer I’m riding her in bareback pad and snaffle instead of the sidepull. Darn sidepull is molded up and desperately needs cleaning before it gets used again. Plus then I have to pull the reins off of the Pelham to make it work. Meh.

We had a nice little walk-trot work, with bending and flexing and circles and loops and patterns and all sorts of stuff. I also worked on extending and shortening in the trot. She does it reasonably well in walk and canter, but trot is where she can get really stubborn and bullish. So we’re spending summer schooling working on that bit. No particular reason for her to do it bareback, that part is mostly for me. This time around I didn’t notice as much of a tendency to slump, and we did a lot more trot work, even working on extensions with me sitting instead of posting.

At the end, Mocha lined out in her huge walk, swinging through her shoulders and back. That’s a really fun walk to ride. She prefers to do it on a long rein with a low head, and man, can she power walk with a low head. Ain’t no peanut roller with this girl and a low head–that’s her moving out gear at the walk, and she shows it well.

She’s also much shinier than she was last year. I don’t know, her coat seemed not quite right most of the year last year, at least until I shaved her for the winter. This year she’s sleek and shiny. Of course, I’ve spent a lot of time at the barn the past two weeks and brushing her. I’m trying to get out there at least four times a week, if not five. The added attention shows, and I feel good about it.

Then after coming home and doing the food preparation stuff, I set up a chair on the front porch, pulled on a sweater, and took the laptop out front to write. I started this story, “Bearing Witness,” back in January, then broke off to write “Beer Goes to War,” another story that didn’t sell, and the Uprising edits. Then I got into writing the Netwalk: Foundations giveaways and that’s been a wee bit of a time suck (especially with a story that’s blowing into novelette size). Then there’s been more edits and stuff, so I’ve not gotten back to “Witness” until now.

As always, the added time seems to have helped. But the damn thing seems to want to become a novel, or at least a novella. Ah well, it’s steampunkish or Weird Westish or something. There’s probably a market for it somewhere. I think it’s my summer noodling-about-I-need-a-break-from-Netwalk project.

I think I’m going to spend more time writing outside on the front porch. I did some work on our friend’s porch last Sunday and that was just right. I worked outside today until I came to a stopping place and my fingers got cold.

And now it’s on to doing some housework. I’d like to get some parts of the place in order before I start taking classes!

Onward.

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Busy days, busy days

There’s been a lot of blog silence of late, mostly because I’ve been treading water trying to keep from overdoing and getting sick during the last weeks over school and like, well, writing, y’know? Committing to the twice-monthly Foundations series has proven to be huge, especially since I find myself wanting to write regular stories instead of the drabbles I’d first envisioned. I have at least one that I’m going to offer as a sales short (too long IMO to give away), and another set of three where I am consciously playing point-of-view-games-while-progressing-the-story games. Those are going to be fun, and help me grow as a writer, and, hey, no consequences since I don’t plan to sell them but give them away. OTOH, it’s all good backstory preparation for the big transition in the Netwalk Sequence, from Melanie to Bess.

But! Other things are going on. The last day of school with students was on Wednesday of last week (the 12th), where I met the kids at the swimming pool, watched MUCH CUTENESS (yes, middle schoolers can STILL be cute), went to the park with them for lunch, then herded cats while we watched Epic. Visually nice but I started out collecting plot coupons and the story pretty much unfolded the way I thought it would. But hey, Very Nice Visuals. Sweet story but very predictable. Phyl, you’d like the depiction of the faery world.

Next day, had my eval, talked planning for the fall, loaded up what I’m bringing home for the summer (mostly files to sort and reorganize), and landed a job interview. After a leisurely lunch at the Rendezvous, I headed for home only to find a worried phone call on my cell once I got my messages. The Mysterious Overfeeder had struck again, feeding horses before the person who was supposed to be feeding. Only happens when the owner/trainer is gone. Always alfalfa. NOT a good thing. Luckily, this is the second time in about four years, and we think we’ve identified the culprit. No horses took harm, as it happened just before the feeder showed up so she knew it had happened and didn’t double feed them. Most worrisome, though, was the feeding and quantity of the stuff to horses and ponies who don’t get that rich a feed usually. Fortunately for MO, no horses colicked or foundered. And Mocha was fine. This is a Very Good Thing, as my Mama Bear mode gets unfurled big time by stupid stuff like this.

Friday, I participated in an administration/union leadership golf game which was entertaining and not at all what I usually do (more what I would expect to be doing as corporate wife than as teacher). Gorgeous day for it with 70 degree temps, partially cloudy skies that opened up to full sun toward the end of the afternoon, and BIRDS. Adolescent robins dodging golf balls while squawking for food (um, only a few of us had any experience, and some didn’t even bring clubs. I rocked my Eastmoreland Garage Sale $3 Tournament Queen golf set from the 50s/60s). A young osprey or red-tail screaming to be fed in one of the Doug firs. A hummingbird who hovered threateningly over one hole, but never swooped on us, just hovered there Letting Us Know that we were intruding.

We played best ball golf, which was a good thing, as otherwise I think some of us would still be whacking our way around the course. It was my first time playing something besides a par 3 course so I got very friendly with my woods and drivers. But it was all in good fun, relaxing, and a nice end to the school year.

Saturday was Jaycon, which gets its own post because hey! pictures!

Sunday was the ballet, plus various Seckrit Project-related writing things.

Monday was writing, horse, and some other fiddley-foo stuff which sucked up my time.

Yesterday was a job interview, massage, and Fireside Writer day.

Today I need to meet someone and sign union-related paperwork, then do barn, then come home and do house stuff and work. And write. Of course I’m going to be writing!

Whew. It’s been a soft landing as far as finishing off school years is concerned. But if the past week is any indication, I’m going to be making up for the exhausted paralysis of previous years big-time. I have many things to be doing. Can I do them all (oh yeah, throw in three college classes this summer. Two of them will be self-paced, but even so…)

Onward!

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Let the rantage begin–feminist stuff

WARNING: GROUCHY SEMI-COHERENT FEMINIST RANT HERE.

So you’ve been warned.

This particular piece has been going around my Facebook and now my LJ. I’m putting up the full link so if you’ve seen it before, you don’t have to Go There.

http://www.theatlantic.com/sexes/archive/2013/06/the-secret-to-being-both-a-successful-writer-and-a-mother-have-just-one-kid/276642/

Read it already?  Want to read it?  Here’s a hint: if you’re a mother and a writer, you’ve already heard this BS. I can just about guarantee it. Somehow your motherhood either condemns you to writing glowing tributes to Super!Mommy!Life! (oh god, does anyone remember the early days of Joyce Maynard’s columns? or the subsequent implosion which would have made more sense having known more About Her Past Literary Connections?) or you become Supermom With The Single Child who goes everywhere and does everything and Achieves In Spite Of Parenthood.

Yeah. The early years of my mothering life got spent in the late 80s, when Greed Was Good (oh hell yes, I was a complex securities litigation paralegal during that era and I Have Stories) and if you had a child, the mandatory rule was a.) You write many opinion pieces talking about How Wonderful Parenthood Is and How Awful Feminism Is or b.) You Were Total Careerist Yuppie And Nannies Ruled Your Life. And you wrote opinion pieces about that life as well. I started frothing pretty damn fast when reading that BS, because though I was a mother and staying at home with the kid, I was sure as hell writing and still saw myself as a feminist (and was Not Supermommy. Really. I tried. So not me).

I ended up staying at home and taking care of the kid because I’d managed to get myself compromised by working on some of the biggest local securities cases for a couple of litigation support companies which meant I had major conflicts of interests at the time with most of the local law firms–and one of the biggest litigation support companies was on the blacklist for many of the local law firms because they’d been such jerks. Plus, computerization was getting a toehold into the particular specialty I was working. In the course of five years litigation support went from needing many trained bodies to eyeball documents to code and enter into a mainframe to doing the same function on a 386. And that was before search engine optimization happened. So yeah–that profession kinda sorta went down the dumpster, but I had figured that out by observing that desperate law students trying to pay off their law school loans would take paralegal jobs. I had to review resumes for a paralegal job in one position, and realized that–um, well, the future in this profession ain’t what I was told it was going to be, given the number of desperate law students looking for work. Pay scales were dropping from what they had been just a couple of years before, so…

Realistically, at the time, any job I could pull down at the time with my experience level would not have paid for the daycare. I certainly couldn’t earn enough to justify my spouse staying at home, and I really didn’t see where it would gain us anything in that particular career option for me to stay in work and try to advance in the field. As it was, I managed to eke out time between preschool and different daycare options to scratch out enough time to write. Because I’m one of those slowly developing writers (I got bogged down pretty quickly at the almost-good-enough level, still working my way through that), and because I have the ADHD impatience trait in spades, I ended up going back to work off and on once kid went to school. Writing came and went, but that was as much a function of my own frustrations at not being able to break through with the stories I wanted to tell as it was parenthood. I tried writing nonfiction for a while, but it didn’t serve the same jones that fiction did, plus I’d get bored with it as a regular gig.

I find it to be an element of highest irony that the first paid piece I ever sold was “I Am A Feminist Housewife” to a local feminist monthly that went out of business. I think I’m one of the few who got a check from that lovely little tabloid (they paid for the first two issues). I also think I sold that piece two or three more times, with one more reprint. At the time, I was rebelling against the assumption that because I was a stay-at-home mom, I wasn’t a feminist.

And now. Good freaking heavens. You can’t be a writer and manage more than one kid? Um, I suspect that if you look at the numbers of women published during the Fifties, fercrissake, you’d find women without staffs and nannies juggling kids and writing. Good God, Fanny Trollope was far from the only nineteenth century woman who took up writing to support family–and that wasn’t a one-kid setup, either.

What this does mean is that you manage more than one kid but you don’t elevate Motherhood to High Art. After all, that’s what the subtext really is about. With one kid, or so the subtext goes, you can have A Real Life. With more than one–you’re screwed.

To which I reply–baloney. What gets screwed is the delusion that you can work and still be Perfect! 50s! Mommy! The Atlantic piece whimpers about how more than one child would have diffused the focus of the women Lauren Kessler chooses to hold up as the epitome of writing women.

Um. Yeah. Really? Look, when it comes to multiple kid families and anything other than upper class incomes, juggling happens, whether Mom works outside the house or not. I hate to break it to people like Kessler, but these dilemmas happen to anyone who needs to juggle work, family, and an intense passion that isn’t completely funded. The ability to sit and think about something intensely for hours at a time is a luxury that many people–male and female alike–simply don’t possess. So if you want to tell stories, but you don’t have that time because you lack the resources and you have a young family–you either find ways to make it work for you (because everyone’s solution is different), or you stop doing it until your time is clear. Period.

The issue that all of these debates dances around and does not face on square is that time is a commodity, and the cost of time varies depending on its perceived value to the person it’s being applied to. It’s not the issue of parenting plus job plus writing, or parenting plus writing, or parenting one child vs more and writing–it’s about the management of time as a commodity. Time of women is not universally valued at the same cost as time of men. Time of parenting is not valued at the same cost as work outside the home. Creative time is not valued at the same cost as so-called “real work” at an outside employer. Our time value priorities are screwed up, and that’s the real problem.

(And that, my friends, is a longer post than what I probably should continue on, seeing how long this post has gotten).

So yeah. I’m annoyed by this latest piece of baloney about women and feminism and writing, but I’ve seen it before. And, for the record, I am the parent of only one child–but the reason for that has nothing to do with the writing, and everything to do with the reality that I had a horrific time of pregnancy, starting with conceiving while my mother was dying, suffering through nasty morning sickness for most of the pregnancy, then going through a really tough labor while incubating a nasty case of staph and afterwards showing up with an abnormal Pap smear that had me fearing I’d leave my baby motherless.

“You’ll forget all that,” people told me.

They were wrong. I flinch at recalling those details even now. I walked away from my only pregnancy knowing that there was no way I was ever, ever going to put myself through that experience again. I love my son and I’m glad I had him–but one was enough.

And thus endeth the rantage for tonight. Hope it was at least semi-coherent.

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This and that, ski day #4, catching up, writer stuff, weird horse humor

Work is crazy and I’ve been sick, therefore minimal blogging.  This state is probably going to continue for at least a couple more weeks, and then I’m hoping it will cool off for a while.  ‘Tis the IEP season, and furlough days add to the challenge.

The latest bug managed to hit everyone in the family in one way or another.  I finally started feeling decent last week and went skiing with another teacher at Friday night ski.  Didn’t see a lot of the students but had a nice time.  Icy, fast, and I was wishing for a little less wax but grateful for newly sharpened edges.  The hips worked okay, but tired quickly.  It’s going to be a while before I can have long, intense ski days with me against the Mountain in a storm.  But hopefully it can happen again.

I remembered why I’m not a wild fan of night skiing after a bluebird day.  Bluebird days mean sun and melting, which means freezing after the sun gets low, which means ice.  Sure, it’s stunningly beautiful, especially if there happens to be a full moon (sadly, no), but it was not a night for challenges.  I went down Vicky’s once and ended up muttering and swearing along the way, mainly the upper stretch.  But it’s just one short and steep, narrow dip, and then the rest of the run’s pretty sweet.

Still, that upper stretch?  Arrgh.

I did manage to knock off a short story last week, complete from original notes on Saturday to final draft submitted on Friday.  Themed anthology piece, hope it works.  If it does get accepted, I think I’m going to use it as a plotting/organizing example, then tuck it aside as a potential teaching piece.

Mocha has been quixotic this week.  G has been gone for judge training and his absences do set her off stride.  Girl likes her routines.  Nonetheless, she’s been pushy in small ways.  Some of them are fun, like when she took off a lot faster and harder than I expected when we did rundowns.  I laughed and rode with it.

But then there are the other times.

She got grouchy about me asking her to do two strides of canter between two points in another session, and decided I must really mean “trot,” not “canter.”  Discussions ensued, including entertaining lateral evasions at rollback speeds, popping of whip, and sessions of two canter strides, whoa, two canter strides, whoa, two canter strides, whoa, all around the rail, in both directions.  A bit of that, and then she decided she could do it between two points after all.

I’d be more worried but we have occasional sessions like this where she just plain decides to get sticky about something she’s done repetitively before.  She’s overthinking it, for some reason, and that usually means she’s reprocessing this familiar movement in connection with something else we’ve been working on.  I don’t always understand the linkages she’s making but there generally is a connection.  Smooth out the behavior she’s sticking on and the other movement we’re developing also improves.

She’s also been getting pushy in little ways on the ground and I’ve had to correct her.  In talking to G tonight, she started anticipating a stop, or turning in a particular way to face him, without being cued to do it.  In fact, she moved from a position I’d put her in to a position she preferred.  I corrected it by moving her around, then reparking her.  She didn’t move.  Little stuff?  Yeah.  But with a horse like her, best to stop this stuff early and firm.

G commented that she was herding and driving the other mares around in turnout today.  Making a play to be alpha?  It would match the pushiness she’s been showing–it’s spring and The Girl is feeling dominant.

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