(vector by happymay, from Depositphotos, uploaded in 2014)
So why is it that it took until I was sixty-six years old to regularly start making my bed without being prompted?
Until recently, I had the attitude toward housework as a necessary evil that needed to be done but not necessarily organized. Oh, I did the usual chores but stuff like making the bed wasn’t that big a deal. If anything, I shoved a lot of housework chores into “must be crammed into a short period of time so I can get back to doing what I want/what the job demands.” Which…made sense, but also chunked up housework into big jobs that got put off instead of doing them in bits and pieces.
What brought this change? Was it the lockdown and continued social distancing? Sorting through stuff to downsize in my elder years? A weakening of my feminist principles? Or just a factor that “well, I’m retired and at home, I need something to do to distract me from writing?”
Or all of the above, perhaps?
I’m not sure. Part of this move is, I think, a reflection of my move toward organizing and simplifying my office, and moving outward from that. Mucking out the shelves that held a lot of my office supplies went a long ways toward organizing the office because most of what I need is either easily accessible or visible. Though I do need to clean papers off of my writing desk (and that is noted in the planner for this week).
Some of this increased focus on organizing and planning housework is also a reflection of dealing with aging and the consequences thereof. It’s a lot easier to manage the house if the piles of books and papers are…fewer. Not so much to trip over, knock over, or get lost.
I’ve also gotten past the notion that certain things need to be blocked together. Vacuuming…well, that needs to be the whole house. But dusting before vacuuming? Not every week, and not at the same time.
Other factors come into play, too. Making my bed wasn’t very easy when we had a mattress on the floor (which was spouse’s preference for many years, until I put my foot down for a platform setup because my hips were objecting to the floor placement). Even though we got a platform, I still didn’t make the bed regularly for years, in part because access to both sides became a pain due to tight quarters. But even when we moved and had more space, I still wasn’t doing it regularly.
Then we got a new, thicker mattress. While the sheets and bedding still fit, I found that I needed to redo the bed a lot because sheets and bedding didn’t stay tucked. Making the bed daily got around that obstacle. But a change in bedding style from years ago also made a big difference. Unlike when younger, I don’t use a bedspread over blankets, but either have a quilt or a comforter on the bed. I don’t tuck the pillows underneath the bedspread because I don’t have a bedspread and the quilt/comforter isn’t that long (lemme tell you, getting that coverage over the pillows so that it didn’t look like I just pulled it over the top was a pain, much less getting things even…yikes). But somehow, as a result of the new mattress, I realized I could just turn down the top edge like they do in hotels…so much easier. Now I usually make the bed when I get dressed for the day, unless something such as plans to wash sheets or travel interferes.
Allergies also play a role. With the increase in wildfire smoke every summer, both spouse and I are more sensitive to house dust and pollen. Getting organized about cleaning reduces allergen exposures for both of us.
Acknowledging my ADHD is a factor as well. I tend to organize myself more these days because the combination of aging and ADHD is not fun. Add ADHD to the typical aging working memory overload (which I think is a big factor in senior forgetting about stuff that isn’t dementia-related, especially in retirement) and I’ve seen the need to pull myself together with external reminders that work for me. That last piece is the crucial one, because there are a lot of systems that bury themselves in complexity which ends up being problematic in its own way. Or the system relies on handwriting which can be problematic with my arthritic hands. If a system is too complicated or too reliant on handwriting, it ends up falling by the wayside (such as my attempt at writing accountability last year which dragged me directly into extensive burnout).
I think I have a system that seems to work, for now, based on my current circumstances. But I still laugh at myself, because now I’m going through and doing housework stuff that a few years ago I would have snorted at doing.
Like bed making.
On the other hand, it is nice to have the bedding in order at bedtime, and not rumpled chaos.
Hey, if you like what you just read, don’t forget to toss a coin into the Deprived Horses’ Cookie Fund over at my Ko-fi.
(no, they’re not really deprived, they just think they are)
